08 December 2013

Life Changes and Maintaining Steady Practice towards Transformation

Up until about four months ago, my daily efforts practicing the advanced series truly gave me the tools needed to quiet my wandering mind and soothe the dark waters of my soul. This ultra nourishing and potent series was the perfect recipe that changed my life: it taught me how to give and receive love, how to breathe and move to my fullest potential, and how to be more compassionate in this mighty world.

Now, being almost four months pregnant, I am without this sharp tool of discrimination; I am being tested in a new way to access those divine places inside me while maintaining the integrity of the practice. I have intensified my supplemental practices instead of practicing deep asana. These are the ones that used to be on the outside - the practices that used to support my asana practice have now become more important than ever.
Breathing, chanting the sutras and singing devotional prayers and mantras has become my daily practice. Add a small bit of asana to this (no more than forty five minutes) and there is clearly a new path of travel towards my inner temple. It isn't as easy as it used to be when a mentor like Viranchasana took me there every day.

Dena's teachings are quite luminous right now:

"Let It Go
Let It Out
Let It All Unravel

Set it Free
And it may be
A path
On which to travel"

Chanting to Shiva removes all of our illusions. Shiva has been removing the illusions about my self, about the baby and the mother I will be, and about my own suffering. Surrendering to the divine source of wisdom and love, isvara pranidhanani - is truly the greatest practice we can cultivate. And this directly brings all previous and current transformational practices into clarity. 


When life brings about challenges, absorption with ourselves is going to be more difficult and we often resist the practices we know that mend our hearts. If the suffering around you or within you has taken over your ability to focus on accessing the inner temple of your being, then it is necessary to look at the suffering as a preliminary practice before any yoga study can begin. Start by knocking on the door of your own haunted house.


To fully access transformation of the self one MUST take a detailed look at their own suffering. Then once it is on the table, there must be a plan to remove it or fight against it through the effort of specific yogic practices. One must look deeply at why we suffer, and this in my mind, is one of the pivotal preliminary practices to achieving yoga. 


The Yoga Sutras 2.12-2.25 go into depth about our suffering and Patanjali did not put these sutras into the second book on Sadhana, or "Practice" for just any reason. He places suffering and witnessing our own frustrations and karma as an initial step before one can even begin to work on the eight limbs. He offers us many practices on how to calm the dark waters of our citta vritti, but we have to do some work before we can actually begin.


One way for transformation to happen is IF all forms of suffering are removed and limited. When we find stillness in our asana and meditative practices, it isn't necessarily clean and tidy. Sitting with adverse thoughts of ourselves IS one of the most important tools that yogis need to be meditating upon. Suffering is to be avoided, but it can only be avoided if we actually look into its source and find out where it is coming from and contact the source, become intimate with the source in order to make the changes needed.

Being pregnant has taught me that asana and holding on to a practice such as advanced is not really practical right now. I let the practice go right when I found out I was pregnant. My body is different than others, so I am definitely still practicing, but it is a gentle combination of a few of the asanas from primary, intermediate and advanced.


Am I receiving the same information as I did when I was practicing advanced? No, it is definitely different. But though my daily practice has 
changed, I am still sharpening my tools (this is the hard part) so that I can move through my own personal battleground and achieve yoga.

Life's challenges will come - and our frustrations with the world (and ourselves) are buried inside of us. With this realisation, we must be ready to take on supplemental practices that still take us to the same place where we can combat the frustrations that some times never go away. Don't just rely on asana to take you there; it will, but be observant of how much you rely on it. Remember, this is just one limb.

For transformation to happen in your life, perhaps you are dumbfounded as to where to start. Try the yamas, look deeply into the first limb of yoga. And if you are truly looking in the right places inside you, you'll know this is the best place to begin as the yamas reveal the kleshas that hold us back from achieving yoga. 


I'm off to go chant to Shiva and sit in padmasana. This my friends and readers, is the best gardening that I can do for myself, and for my growing and blessed family around me and inside me.

I feel blessed I have had such incredible mentors to help me understand some of the wisdom that yoga offers: Christine Hoar, David Garrigues, Dena Kingsberg, Randa Chehab and my dear friend, Gretchen Arguedas. It is with great respect that I share that if I hadn't been taught additional practices and spent great amounts of time with these individuals, I wouldn't have the ability to share such thoughts revealed in this blog post - or the tools needed for the greatest practice that lies ahead of me - motherhood.